Monday night during small group, we were discussing the topic of education, communication and support as we move forward after betrayal. It is fundamental to understand the importance of support not only for the betrayer, but also the betrayed. Reason being is that our society has made us numb to the staggering amounts of visual sexual sin in every aspect of our world. Whether it's a commercial, magazine, books, TV or through the internet, boobs and butts are everywhere!
Knowing this may be an area where you stumble is critical to healing and having someone as your "buddy" to support you in the struggle.
Rick Warren wrote a perfectly fitting daily devotion that touches on this subject:
“Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so God can heal you. When a believing person prays, great things happen.”
(James 5:16 NCV)
People don’t go to war by themselves. It would be a suicide mission. Someone has to have your back.
You need a battle buddy.
The same is true in the spiritual battles we all face. You can’t go to war against lustful thoughts, dishonesty, addictions, and fear by yourself. You’ll be doomed to fail.
If all you want is to be forgiven, admit your sin and brokenness to God. If you want to make a change, admit it to someone else.
Revealing your sin is the beginning of healing. You don’t have to admit your sin to everyone. But you need to admit it to someone. You need one person who’ll love you unconditionally, accept you completely, and pray for you constantly. You need someone of the same gender to be open and honest with.
The Bible says in James 5:16 “Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so God can heal you. When a believing person prays, great things happen” (NCV).
When you confess your sins to someone else, you open the relief valve and take the pressure off. Suddenly, the boogieman isn’t so big.
Often sin is a cycle. You start out humbly asking God for help, so he gives you the power to make it. After about six months of success, you start getting prideful. Then, you fall. And, in humility again, you ask God for help. If you could stay in that spirit of humility, you’d be good. But pride always returns.
You can’t kick that kind of cycle without friends who’ll pray for you, care for you, encourage you, and keep you on track. When success comes, they’ll help you keep your perspective so your humility stays in check.
That’s why local churches are so important. But you can attend many churches for years and never put yourself in a situation where you know others and are known by others. Make the effort to find a small group of believers in a local church with whom you can be open and honest.
To think you can quit a bad habit without being honest about it with others is simply a cop out. It never works. You guarantee failure when you do that.
Go find yourself a buddy!
About the Author
Stephanie is a stay-at-home mommy to four little blessings. Married for 16 years, Tim and Stephanie find new ways to enjoy intimate time together while raising the young family.